Conversation.

Date: Today.
Time: A little earlier than Now.

Universe?
Yes?

I realized something today.
And what is that?

I don't think I trust you enough.
Really? Whatever do you mean?

(are you being sarcastic?)
(yes, I am. go on.)

I think I automatically assume that you're just not going to be there for me. I just assume that you're never going to provide what I need.
And why is that?

That's a really long story.
One day we'll have to talk about it.

I know, but not today.
That's okay.

Anyhow, there was this thing I was wanting.
Mmmm hmm.

I just assumed I would never have it.
Why did you assume that?

Because I hold it in my head two-thirds of the time that the Universe is a mean ol' place.
And is it? Am I a mean ol' place?

It's hard not to think so sometimes.
And so?

And so I've been in a bad mood for weeks, thinking how I would never have this thing I really wanted.
And then what happened?

Today - there it was. Suddenly it just showed up. I'm not even talking metaphor. The thing literally just showed up.
It did, didn't it?

I didn't have to go to it. It was just there for me.
It was, wasn't it?

I spent a lot of energy ranting and railing against you, you know.
Yes, I know.

It occurs to me that I could have wasted less time being a sour puss and actually have caused that thing I wanted to happen. Maybe the thing would have happened sooner.
Oh, you're finally realizing that now, are you? Good.

Yeesh, I am such a brat.
Yes, you can be.

Sorry.
It's okay.

I'll probably be a brat again tomorrow.
*sigh* I know. And I'll be proving you wrong again tomorrow.

Can I just take a minute and be thankful?
Of course.

****

j.