Softening.

Matt Pierce sounds like Stephen Stills.

At least, I got that feeling and told him so. And I wondered, "Is that right, is Stephen Stills the person I'm thinking of?"

So I went to YouTube, and started listening to Stephen Stills. Yes, Stephen Stills is the person I was thinking of. And Yes, Matt Pierce indeed does recall Stephen Stills for me in a few of his songs. Of course, I started clicking through. To Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young. And Crosby, Stills, and Nash.

Jeez, are they good.

But I could hardly make it through a video.

"You...who are on the road...must have a code...that you can live by..."
Tears. Click.

"When you were young and on your own...How did it feel to be alone..."
Tears. Click.

They did a jaw-dropping cover of The Beatles' Blackbird. The harmonies therein are mighty. Didn't make it through that either.

The tears are not a problem, except I'm at work. In an open-plan office. Thank god, it's dark and almost empty.

When I was a freshman in high school, I was on a camping trip, in a parked van with some classmates. Atlantic Starr's "My First Love" came on the radio, and a guy nearly fell over himself (and a few other people) escaping the van. Later, I asked him why. He said that song reminded him of an old girlfriend and he couldn't listen to it anymore. At the time, I thought this curious, even a bit silly. "It's just a song," I thought.

I get it now. I *so* get it now. Music is wrecking me these days in ways that it never has, ever. The songs aren't even ones to which I've had previous emotional connections (e.g., my Elton John episode the other day). It's happening in the weirdest places, and at the most inconvenient times. Wherever I am, I'm just a step or two away from re-experiencing a wound. Or maybe, experiencing a wound for the first time.

I feel like this sometimes:
That the world must be softening me for something.
Something good, I hope.
(Or, at least, something interesting.)

(I did make it through the CS&N Woodstock performance of Judy Blue Eyes here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EzF_MoXOU1E
Someone wrote: "no auto tune there my brothers and sisters...." This made me smile.)